More and then more again

I've been so sentimental this fall winter. Thinking of everyone who has gone before and I'm missing. See it's still all about me. Well I do spend my regular working day only thinking about others for 12 hours. I do try to give them my best, and treat them special. But here lately I don't get treated as special. My husband doesn't seem overjoyed and seems to take me for granted when I get home from work. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of everything right now. I'm tired of being short every paycheck and giving up things that I like so we can have other things that others like. Today I am burned out on life.

Election day. Cannot wait for this crap to be over. As usual, by this time of the election process I am starting to dislike every runner. And would rather shoot my phone than answer it. The trouble is I don't really.  Cynical?  Oh yeah!

More and more people, important people, have gone from my life. Dying young has it's benefits, everyone else suffers your loss. The less losses you suffer. Well I have passed that point now. Gone are the two dear people above. I like to look at this picture taken long ago. They were climbing, in an area that still in many ways means home to me. It's almost a thousand miles from where I am now, but I just have to close my eyes to feel there. To feel the bluffs, the quarrys and the rivers. I wouldn't physically go back in time if I could. Life should be a progression, hopefully in a positive way. I'm still trying. As we all do in our own way.